Postpartum depression is a form of depression that can affect new mothers within the first several months of birth. It is a form of depression that strikes just as a new baby needs to be taken care of and when bonding between mother and baby begins.
It is not the natural sadness that some mothers feel following the birth of a baby. This natural sadness is often mixed with feelings of joy and resolves itself within several weeks. This postpartum disorder is something more.
Risk Factors
Any new mother can experience the postpartum symptoms of depression, but there are certain factors that seem to make this experience more likely to occur. Previous bouts of depression mean an increased likelihood of depression postpartum. As stated previously, this does not make the postpartum form of depression a certainty, but it does increase the chances of depression occurring.
Poor support from friends and family may contribute to the likelihood. A sick baby could introduce an added element of stress that could increase your likelihood of depression postpartum, as could having a very stressful life in general.
Symptoms
Often depression symptoms are thought of as affecting an adult and those surrounding him or her, but in the case of postpartum disorders there can be a profound impact on the child, too.
The general symptoms include feeling sad, empty, and hopeless. Anxiety may present itself in addition to these. A loss of interest in life may occur. Changes in appetite or sleep patterns may manifest. An inability to concentrate is common as well. All these symptoms interfere with the mother’s ability to provide care for and bond with the new baby.
Treatment
The most common treatment is counselling services and antidepressant medication, much in the way that other types of depression are treated. A mother who is considering taking antidepressants will want to discuss the effect that such medication might have on the possibility of breast feeding for the child.
The main thing a mother can do is to get professional help and to maintain her own health. This means eating well, getting enough sleep, and getting regular exercise. All can help facilitate recovery.
Postpartum depression strikes at an inopportune time to say the least. There is no good time to be depressed, but the interference with caring for and parenting the new baby can be hard on both the baby and the mother. By seeking professional help, this depression can be treated and life, both lives, can go on as planned.
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53 Comments
What many people rarely discuss is that PND can strike many months after the birth and can be exacerbated following IVF as well. The fear that people think you simply ‘can’t cope’ or that the children will be effected keeps one silent.
I am still suffering depression 3 years after the birth of my second child. I didn’t tell many people when my baby was little as I was afraid they would think I wasn’t coping or that I was a bad mother. Even now I am reluctant to tell people when I am suffering or need time off work as generally people do not understand. They think that everyone feels tired and fed up and you should just get on with it. Some people have even asked me “what have you got to be depressed about?” This was not helpful. I am trying to do all I can when I feel well to ellimnate the stigma pf depression and mental illness generally so that people don’t have to suffer in silence and shame but rather ask for the support they need.
Seek help; talk therapy, don’t let the doctor give you pills.
I think both counselling and drugs can help and should be considered. If it helps then it worth trying it.
I have recently given birth to my third baby. I was diagnosed with PND 6 weeks ago. Everyone keeps telling me to go on the pills but I really don’t want to. My midwife has turned into my friend so she visits once a week and we chat for an hour. I am on a long waiting list for counselling and my GP is seeing me once a week. I have good days and really bad days. Nobody prepares a new mother for these horrible feelings and there is not much help locally. Things are getting bad for me and I know my wonderful family is suffering too. I also feel like an old eating disorder has crept back into my life after 15 years because of the depression so I really feel helpless.
Karen- hang in there.
6 months ago i felt the same and had similare repercussions from the past come back to haunt me.
For me, the drugs from the doctor didn’t help so i’ve come off them and found that eating healthy and taking lots of vitamins, especially B vitamins and st johns wort have helped. i know how lonely it can be but you can find your old self again.
I wanted to reply to Karen who posted a comment today. You really must go back to the doctor and make sure they know how bad you are. Don’t be afraid to take tablets. You wouldn’t not put your arm in a cast if it was broken would you?! If taking a tablet a day will make you and your family’s life better then what is the problem? I felt like you and I do understand but you really need to give it a try and don’t be afraid of the stigma that there still is surrounding medication for depression. You won’t always feel like this I promise. You will feel better with time but at the moment please take the help that is there for you. You need to be well. This is the most important thing. Take care.xx
Thank you guys for your support and comments. I have decided to take the pills and I have a counselling session booked in for next week. I am hoping this helps. I gave in because I collapsed last week with a huge panic attack and fainted. I was rushed to hospital but I was luckily sent home the same day. I cannot go on like this. My family are the most important things in my life, I have to try for them as well as myself. x
I am so sorry to hear what you have been through. You sound very brave. I hope all the medication & therapy help you. It so hard and isolating being a new mum or mum full-stop I know but help is there and you are rightly seeking it now. Lots of luck & warm wishes.
xx
Karen, I’ve been thinking of you a lot. Hope you are starting to feel less stressed now that you have the help you deserve and need. Keep us posted xx
Well i’ve took the first steps. I had my first counselling session yesterday which was very emotional and once again had another panic attack in the car park. This morning I have been to the GP for the pills. I am going to start them tomorrow. Also had a meeting with the health visitor today so everyone is keeping their eye on me. I feel like I am dying inside and every day is a huge battle. I do hope all this help is worth it and I hope I start seeing a difference soon. I will keep you posted, thanks again for your comments and support. x
HI KAREN. JUST TO SAY I AM SO GALD YOU WENT FOR COUNSELLING AND IT WILL GET EASIER EACH TIME YOU GO. I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH AND MANY OF US HAVE BEEN THERE. MY BIGGEST FEAR WAS THAT PEOPLE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND BUT EVERYONE HERE DOES AND IT IS SUPRISING HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE SUFFERED. WHEN I STARTED TO GET BRAVE ENOUGH AND TELL OTHERS HOW I WAS FEELING I WAS AMAZED HOW MANY HAD ALSO GONE THROUGH IT OR KNEW FAMILY OR FRIENDS WHO HAD AND WERE VERY SYMPATHETIC. IT WILL NOT ALWAYS BE LIKE THIS. ONE DAY YOU WILL FEEL WELL AGAIN. IT MAY TAKE TIME BUT YOU WILL GET THERE. I AM TESTIMONY TO IT. TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF AND KEEP IN TOUCH WITH THE FORUM. NIA. X
Hi Nia. Thank you. I have felt feelings over the past few days which I cannot admit to. I hope these feelings start to fade as the pills kick in. I am like you, nervous about what others will think about the depression and the pills. I have always been such a strong person, some of my friends call me super women. I don’t feel at all like a super woman at the moment. I will keep in touch and let you know how things go. K x
Hi, I am not sure if I am suffering with PND or not. I know that I havent felt myself since I fell prenant with my 2nd daughter. I originally went to the GP’s to say that i felt slightly depressed but came away from there thinking that he was not really interested. I hardly go out of my flat any more, my kids are coped up indoors for most of the time unless their dad takes them with him. I feel very alone as I have moved to a new area and do not know anyone, though i dont really have many friends anyway. I dont really feel as though my partner gives me any support he just thinks i need to pull myself together & get on with it. I have not been to the doctors about this, I keep thinking about making an appointment but never get round to it. My eldest daughter is definately suffering, she has just turned 2 in may and she is having numerous problems in nearly every aspect. I really dont know what to do or where to go for help. I am fed up of never being able to go to sleep, I am up until @ least 2.30am everyday & have not had more than 4 hours sleep @ night since september 08, when my 2nd daughter was born. Sometime I find myself thinking, “what on earth did I ever want kids for” but I do love both of them very much. When things get bad I do feel like running out the door and leaving forever, but i could not bring myself to do it, but it scares me that I am able to think this way. There are other factors of my life which I wont go into which makes the whole situation worse. I hardly ever get anytime to myself as my parents live aprox 400 miles away & his mum is 73 & I dont think it would b fair to expect her to cope with both girls together as they are extremely demanding. I would really like to hear from…, well anyone who has something to say. I do love my girls ever so much but dont feel that I am doing anything right by them, I do love my partner ever so much as well but just wish he was not so bloody selfish all the time & expecting me to do everything & be more open to what i think & not always think that his way is the only way!!!! Thanks for taking the time to listen. x
In reply to Sarah…my advice to you would be to get in touch with your health visitor and really tell her how you are feeling without holding back or making it sound not as bad as it is. She should give you support in a practical way with the children as well as a shoulder to cry on becausse they have experience in pnd. If this is no good and your health visitor does not support you go to your GP and tell them the same. I would also recommend counselling. You can get it on the nhs but there may be a waiting list. If you can afford it pay to have it privately. It may seem a lot but if it makes life worth living it is worth it. Once you have done this and you feel you have support for yourself then takle your partner. I have to tell my husband I was depressed. They don’t see it like other women do .You have to tell them even though to you it seems obvious. Say you have been to the doctor and how you feel and that you need help with the children. Think of practical things he can do to make your life easier ad give you a break. You are working 24/7 if you are with the kids all the time. If he has a job at least he gets proper breaks, a lunch time and a nights sleep!! Really spell it out and say you need help. It is not a weakness to ask but a strength because it takes someone really brave to do it. Please do something about how you are feeling and keep in touch via the forum. I hope this has been of help.Take care. Nia x
Sarah. I agree with everything Nia has said. You must communicate how you feel for the whole family’s sake but most of all for your’s. You have a right to be heard & understood. You are doing one of the most important jobs in society today – raising your children. The stress & pressure are unrecognised by many people but you have to get help & support. Talk about what is going on in your head. Hard I know but essential. Good luck.
Thanks very much for taking theime out to reply to me I am very gratful.
I am going to make an appointment to see either health visitor or my GP for next week, as soon as possible. I am glad that i found this site and that others do feel the same, after making my post this morning I was able to do a lot of thinking and I now realise that how I am feeling is rubbing off on my whole family so I have to do something and quickly. Just knowing this has already made me feel a lot better, so thanks loads. I will keep you updated once i have had my appointment, xx
Sarah,
I really feel for you. The health visitor may be a better place to start. I found mine really helpful and supportive, they also spoke to the doctor before my appointment to let him know that he should take my problems seriously, and he did. Also, do all you can to get some descent sleep, it’s amazing the difference that can make especially after such a long time of sleep deprivation. Get your partner on board with this, even if it’s just over the weekend. It’s hard when they have to get up to go to work but you are doing a very important job too and you need sleep to be able to do this well. Best of luck with it all.
The girls have got a health check with the health visitor on wednesday so i’ll speak with her then.
The problem is that when I do go to bed I cant sleep anyway I lay awake thinking about what bleeding cleaning & other jobs I have got to do! I am not sure but I have also been reading up on P.N.O.C.D.
I wish sometimes that he did have to get up & go to work,but he got laid off about 3 wks b4 our 2nd daughter was born & not been able 2 get work. sometimes I wonder if I would be better off on my own as he doesnt really help me with anything, but I do love him, I dont think i would be able to cope on my own!
You’ve got so much to deal with Sarah.
Have a chat tomorrow with your HV, they’ll be a good starting point. They are there for you as much as the children. Mine used to come out to visit me once they realised i was struggling. Hope it goes well.x
i got pnd when i had my daughter 3 years ago it was awfull, i remember thinking when i was pregnant that im guna get pnd ,b.cos id sufferd depression before ,so wen i had her i felt a bond in the hospital but when i got home a few days in it turned in to resentment i felt as tho she was just there crying on purpose to keep me awake then i felt no bond at all ,just felt as in i dint love her and i made me feel so bad i knew that it was postnatal depression and it was quite common but bcos it was me going through it i was still so ashamed …when i went to the docs he sed do u resent her and i lied and said no ,just thort they might take her off me ,so i said no i think its just normal deppression like b4 so ive been on tablets ever since ,but i wish i would have told the truth and got some councilling for it because i still get it bk now n then but this time i think she doesnt love me ,probably from the guilt that i dint love her .my feelings to her are fine now i love her to peices .think i might still get some councilling for it bcos im scared to have any more children now incase it happens again x
In reply to Kim, I think it would be a good idea to get counselling even if you feel you have got better. Or talk to your health visitor. If you are lucky you wil get one that will listen but I know a lot of them are a waste of time. Always tell them the truth. They will not take the baby off you unless there is strong evidence that you will harm her. Saying that you feel resentment and can not bond will not harm her and anywya you say your feelings ofr her are fine now. Use the help that is available. It is there to support you not judge you. take care. I know how you feel about being scared about having more kids i feel the same. But don’t let it put you off. Now you are ready for it you can spot it early, people can keep an eye on you and you can get over it. x
In reply to Sarah. I am going through a nightmare at the moment so I know how you feel. Please do seek help. My counselling is doing me the world of good and I have now started anti-depressants after being in denial for weeks. This forum has also helped me, knowing other women who have or are suffering too. We are all here to help each other. Talk to your partner, you may be surprised how he reacts. Print off some PND information to back up what you are telling him. This will help him understand. You must also ask your HV about toddler groups in your area for your 2 year old. I have to really push myself immensely to keep my 3 yr old son happy. Try to get out more, the fresh air and exercise will also do you and your kids good. Good luck. Karen xx
thanks very much for your advice nia ,im going to make a appointment at docs ,and ill promise too be honest this time …its reasuring when other people are going through the same thing ill keep you posted thanks again xxxxxxxxx
my heart goes out to all of you suffering pnd, i just had my second baby and i have it bad im so angry and sad and fed up i want to die and run away and stay and do the best i can all at the same time i love my husband and my girls but i feel ive lost myself some where, im scared ill hurt them or myself, ive sufferd depression and eating disorders since i was a child it never seems to end my husband doesnt understand he is so strong he just copes i feel like im dragging him down
I have not been in touch for some time. I have had an awful time. In the past few months I have taken two overdoses and suffered really bad with the PND. I am now on a very strong dose of drugs which are helping. I had also taken to alcohol so I also take an anti-craving drug to help me with that. My eating has not improved and I have now lost 4 stone. I wish all this would end. I love my family so much and I feel sorry for them. I hope you guys are feeling better. Hope to hear from someone soon. Best wishes, Karen x
Karen
I am so sorry that you have had such an awful time. Keep going to your doctor, health visitor and counsellor. Your family need you. You may not feel like you are any good to them but you must believe your chidlren need their mother. You have to get better for them. You must do everything you can to get better and you WILL get better. Whe you are feeling at your lowest and want to end it all just think…your children will think you didn’t love them enough to stay and they will think they are unlovable. You owe it to them to get through this. Get all the support you need and use the support around you.
Take care of yourself. You need to get well to look after you 3 lovely children.
Nia x
In resonse to Karens post Nia couldn’t have put it better. It may not feel like it but your children need you so much. Keep on trying, take each hour, each day at a time and gradually you will be feeling better. Thinking of you, xx
Nia & Rachel. Thank you for your response. I didn’t expect such a quick reply. I have been to see my CPN today and she assures me that she is there for me and that I can trust her but I am so unsure. I have had the social services onto me because I have turned to drink which I know is a bad thing but it does numb my bad feelings and takes me away from the world I live in every day. I wish I could beat this but I am struggling so much. More than anyone could ever imagine. You see when I have a good day or good hour then all I think about is my family but when I feel bad I cannot help feeling that I would be better off not here. This is what I struggle with every day and I don’t know how I can get out of this nightmare. It’s been 7 months now and there is no light at the end of the tunnel, why???
Karen
My heart goes out to you. You are feeling as you are because you are ill. DEPRESSION IS AN ILLNESS!!! It’s time many people and the general public recognise this. It is nothing to do with you and anything you have done or not done blah blah. You are suffering from an illness that makes you feel like this. I can competely understand how you feel that the drink makes it feel like it all goes away. You really need help with this especially now that the social are involved. Please go to your GP and tell them this aspect of your symptoms and ask for help. Tell them everything about this. Nip this in the bud before it gets even worse. Otherwise it will just be another demon to get over. Please please get help from everyone you can. Never ever be afraid to ask for help and take it when it is offered. Please take care of yourself. You need to be well to look after your children. Please keep in touch and I will look out for your posts. We could even exchange phones numbers if you think this would help.
Please take care. I am thinking of you,
Nia x
Karen, i did exactly the same thing. A couple of glasses of wine in the evening to de-stress and its frighting how quickly this can get out of hand. For the past few months i’ve made a big effort to cut this back though, and it’s amazing the difference this has made. I’ve also been trying to get enough sleep which can be hard with little ones up and down all night but this really helps too. If you can, get your partner to help at nights, get some really good sleep and perhaps take some vitamin suppliments- this all helps to make you feel physically better, and that will directly effect how you feel emotionally. It is an illness and you must not be too hard on yourself but i do believe there are some simple things that can be done to help speed up recovery. It’s taken me over a year to start to feel on top of things again and I’m sure it takes others a lot longer.
The most important thing is that you do, and will, get better. xxx
Hi Rachel & Nia. Thank you so much for your support. I will keep in touch, I promise. I am really trying to stay strong.
Take care, love Karen xx
Hi, 14 weeks ago i gave birth to my second child, 9 days after he was born i was rushed into hospital with blood clott on my lung. I was in hospital for 2 weeks, since i’ve been home i have constant panic attacks about my health and wellbeing. I also feel dead inside and although i love my baby i am not enjoying being a mother, infact i an not enjoying anything. I have been prescribed pills but am to scared to take them because of the side affects. Sometimes i think i’m going to lose controll and go crazy.x
I’m so sorry, you are having a nightmare. Have you got someone you can really confide in? You have been through so much – it is really hard with the 2nd child let alone all the illness you ahve had. I completely understand about feeling like you might lose it. You are not mad though – you are doing so well. Seek help & do what you feel is best for you.
Love & luck.
Five years ago I was diagnosed with puerperal pyschosis after giving birth to my first child. Since then I was treated with ECT and some anti depressants. I fully recovered after the treatment. I continued with my studies and i have been very successful. During my 2nd I started to feel very low in my mood. Eventually I became more and more confused. I ended taking an overdose of paracentamol. When I visited my G.p I was told that am suffering from clinical/severe depression. So now am on treatment of depression and am seeing a counsellor. But am afraid if i will ever recover from this illness again. It has been going on for over 2 months. Please help me with your ideas and experience.
in response to maria…you have fully recovered from this once and you can do it again. it is not something you must feel you inevitably have to live with because you can get better and have done so in the past. please take all the help and support you can get so you can get on with enjoying your 2 lovely children.x
I have postpartum psychosis i’ve been in hospital for 5 months been home 2 months ive never felt so sad i thought coming home would solve all my problems but i just wake up every morning thinking here we go again another day the same i really really wanna get better any one got any tips
yes , read the homepage of this blog ! I know a few people that have taken that oil and had great results , this girl emailed this to me..
Hi
I started taking 3 capsules a day on 18th Dec 09. I suffer from anxiety and depression and in the past have self harmed, ben unable to leave the house, considered suicide and many other things. I have been on various anti-depressants for the last 6 years and even though they took the edge off the depression most days I still felt like life wasn’t worth living, had no sex drive at all, and was using alcohol to self medicate. I researched everything I could to help myself and found your website. Initially I thought the capsules were expensive but bought them at my wits end willing to try anything. I noticed a change immediately as my moods got lighter and I suffered from less anxiety and depression symptoms. My husband is delighted as in only 6 weeks our sex life is almost back to normal! I am a much happier person, I have more patience with the children, everything doesn’t seem like a chore any more the and the only thing I have done differently is take the capsules, everythi!
ng else in my life is exactly the same. I have recommended the capsules to everyone and my husband is also taking them. I would be over the moon to stay as I am but if the capsules go on to make my depression even better I will be ecstatic. I am amazed that they worked and even more amazed at how quickly I noticed a change in myself- literally within days. I no longer consider them at all expensive, they are lifesavers for me and cheaper than drinking a bottle of wine or two every night! Thank you so much xx You are more than welcome to use any of my comments.
Hi Guys. I am still going through hell. I have now changed medication 4 times to see if that works. I have tried to stop using alcohol to self-medicate but on a really bad day its all that makes me feel better. I still have to see my CPN and I am now seeing a specialist from an eating disorder clinic. Every day is a battle, just getting up in the morning and knowing that I have my children to take care of it daunting. I still cannot work although I do try to do an hour a day to keep my mind active. I still have terrible thoughts and I don’t enjoy anything. I now tell my husband & friends that I am fine now just so they don’t worry anymore. Denial is a scary thing!!! I thought PND was not suposed to last this long so why is this happening?? Love Karen xxx
Reply Karen. PND is very nasty disorder. It takes long time to recover fully. It can also come back at any time in life. This according to my personal experience. At the moment i have given up on my work and studies. I am spending much of time at home and am struggling to make sense of life. I am just hoping that one day I will recover again. Nowadays iI simple tell people that am alright even though am not quite well.
Hi just found this sight,Karen so sorry for all your troubles keep your chin up you CAN and WILL get better.
A note to ADMIN i want to try pura epa befor going on the doctors pill,were would you or anyone else recomend i get them from
thanks Marie x x x
Hi everyone, I just read all your comments and feel relieved that im not alone in how i feel. I have 3 beautiful children and only suffered anxiety and depression after my last baby who is now 2 1/2. I feel better than I did in the early months but I still have REALLY bad days (like today) I find it centres around my period and gets much worse when I’m due on? Today I wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there, I’m not suicidal, in fact I love my life! I’m so sceared I’ll have a full blown relapse I feel so bad. Been on peroxatine for 2 1/2 years now, have tried to come off it twice but had horrible side effects and doctor just put my dose back up. I feel like I just don;t know what to do with myself, I can’t talke to family about it because they just don’t understand and I’ve lost touch with all my friends, I feel SO lonely. I just want to feel like me again and not have to battle through the day trying to stay awake and look happy infront of my kids…anyone feel the same and want to discuss? love to you all, Em x
Hi, just found the site & thought I’d email. I have severe post natal depression and my baby is 21 months. I am on medication (strongest dose possible) and think I need to change.I have a wonderful husband and family for support, but I am having pressure from my work to go back.Even though my Dr says I’m not well enough, I’ve been told that my place will not tolerate sickness absence any more. I feel so stressed, I am having anxiety attacks, I’ve become almost a hermit and can only leave the house with somebody else. I feel as though ‘me’ has gone, and I am just here in body. I too have been drinking to make me feel better, and I have gained over a stone and a half in the 7 months that I’ve been off. I have no energy to make lunch for myself, so will just eat crisps, or nothing. I don’t sleep well and wish I knew there was a magic wand. I feel let down & bullied by my employers and have had to get the union involved, which has only added to my stress. Would be nice to get a reply xxx
Hi Cathy. In response to your email posted on 10 April 2010. I can seriously understand your feelings completely. I have had 12 months of what I can only describe as ‘Pure Hell’. Regarding your employee – you have rights and if I was you I would ask a best friend or family member to help you sort this very stressful situation. If you are anything like me I couldn’t make any decisions or think about anything – in fact anything important took a back seat. You cannot afford to lose your job so please ask for help. I have done a drastic thing and took control of what was happening to me. I decided 6 weeks ago to take myself off the anti-depressants. Why you may ask – well I think they were making me worse. I had 10 days of cold turkey which wasn’t funny and not recommended however its the best thing I have done. I now feel a like my old self again. Don’t get me wrong I still have down days but the feeling of suicide has gone & I now only drink like normal people do, just in a social situation. I am still being looked after by my CPN because they are not convinced yet but I feel that I can wake up in the morning and face the day. Please try to eat a little – if you don’t have the energy to cook then eat breakfast cereal, its nutritious, easy and no cooking involved. Also they are not filled with empty calories like crisps. It is important to stay as strong as you can for your baby. I know you are going to say ‘easier said than done’ but my kids have helped me stay alive. Good luck Cathy and keep us all posted on your progress. You are not alone. xxxx
Hi Karen, many thanks for the reply : ) yesterday was one of my lowest days and I felt as though somebody had died.I feel a lot better today, and met my CPN who has agreed that I need to change my medication. I feel good about that. I just want my life back, and no matter how desperately low I feel, I would not do anything to make my family sad. I ate well today & ate lots of fruit which I love : ) It is such an effort to get out of bed, I do just want to hibernate ! My CPN also thinks that my work have added to my stress/anxiety/worry etc. I know I’ll get there, but I want to be there now!! Good luck with your journey, Cathy xx
i never thought id be putting this on the net but u all seem so nice and helpful. iv got two children my youngest is 3 i didnt fink i could feel any lower than i am now. i feel so lost. snapping, bursting into tears for no reason, eatting even when i ant hungery. im so ashamed of how i feel and how im treating my loved ones. i dnt fink i can speak to them about it cause they wont understand im so worried they are gonna fink im being stupid. i did have it when my three yr old was born doctor out me on the tablets and i dint feel myself on them so i stopped taking them and now it seems like its all flooding bck. i feel so loney even tho i live with my boys an my fiance. i dnt wanna go on any tablets iv got an appointment with my gp. is there any advice for wot i can do instead of taking the tablets my gp will put me on. many thanks xxx
Read the homepage that may help !!
Hi Jean, things will get better, but you need to be kind to yourself and the good thing is that you realise that you are not yourself and snapping, crying etc, and want to do something about it. I am slowly crawling out of my own ‘hell hole’ and have come a long way since I sent my last email on this site. My GP took me off my tablets and I’m now on other ones, which suit me much better. Tablets are not for everyone, it is a personal choice. I feel more like ‘me’ and that is a huge leap : ) I still don’t recognise myself, or any part of the old ‘me’ but I am being kind to myself, and I just take each day as it comes. One of my downfalls was to make a mental note of what I wanted to achieve in a day, and out of 7 things I wanted to get done, I would only be able to manage 1 or 2, so I would get angry, eat cr*p etc. I still eat even when I am not hungry, and I’ve gained over a stone and a half, so feel cr*p about that too. But, I know this is just a phase, and I know I have to go through this shit*y time to come out the other side. I know I will do it, and will be a better person for it, as you will. Don’t be afraid to talk to your closest friends or family about how you feel. I hid everything, but my friends thought I didn’t want to see them, and my husband thought I did not love him anymore. So if you explain to your fiance, he will hopefully be a huge support to you : ) I would be lost w/out my husband and my family. Your true friends will understand, and if you get any negative comments from your so called ‘friends’ then they are’nt very good friends are they. I’ve actually joined my local ESTA course, which is for women only, and is for confidence & self esteem etc. Jean, I can honestly say that it has been te best thing I could have done. I’ve made some fab friends, and am learning to feel good about my self & to accept that I am still a good Mummy. Don’t give up and remember, you can email me whenever you need to. Please take care of yourself. Love and hugs from Cathy xx
I suffered post natal psychosis after the birth of my first child and pnd again after my second. I wrote a book about my experience of postnatal illnesses called ‘Strangers In My Mind: Living with Post Natal Psychosis’ which is available on http://www.authorhouse.co.uk
Hi there I had my 4th baby 11 weeks ago and was quite depressed before i gave birth as i had quite servere spd meanig i couldnt do anything for the last 3 months of my pregnancy i suffered from pnd after my last child was really hoping that it wouldnt happen again but for the past couple of weeks ive felt myself getting more and more upset and frustrated over silly little things my house seems upside down and i dont have the energy or the motivation to do anything i just cant do it i really dont want to ask for help or tell anyone as my husband cannot help but tell his family everything and that really doesnt help anything they just make me worse my doctors sent the crisis team out when i had it before and talked about putting me in hospital for a few days and i had to lie to them and say i felt better so this didnt happen i can not go through this again and feel i dont know what to do anymore i just cant win
Hi there all,
I’ve only just discovered this website also. I’ve suffered various bouts of severe depression over the last ten years, with the worst one being in 2007, when I was off work for three months. I was slowly recovered then found out I was pregnant plus having to organise my wedding was difficult but I guess the old hormones kept me going!!
Anyway, approximately 2,3 weeks beore my due date I got very tearful for no reason and so hence the Midwife got the Health Visitor involved………. I cant remember when I went back onto anti-depressants as I decided to come off them when I consulted with th doctor the pro and cons. As I was in such denial with having Post Natal Depression, I resolutely refuse to going back onto Post Natal Depression and it was the worst thing I could have done.
I was a hermit, I coulfd barely cope, what a nightmare! The health visiting team were wonderful.
However I did slowly but surely recover but it does take time, and I still have my ususal insecurity problems, very low moods from time to time and I still my my very black days especially yesterday.
It was very weird but today I’m alot brighter- ( though I’ve through a difficult period at work where they want to move me to a another location and my partner was dismissed temporarily but reinstated afterwards last year. We are also trying to sell our house!!!)
What I would say to Cathy- (April) is that you’re going through a tremendously difficlt time and yes you are right to get the Union involved. It is horrendous as you have to try and cope but it is hard isn’it.
Anyway I would love to set up a local group or something to help other with depression or post natal depression – it would be so so satisfying.
Many regards, Sylvia Owen
Hi Sylvia, keep your chin up : ) I’m doing well. Still on my medication, but feel great. I have also joined slimming world & know that will really help me – as extra weight is no good to anybody. I’m back in work (I did have no option, but at least I have a job, and no job would be worse!.)I am slowly getting there, still have my bad days, byt have more good days, which I’m really thankfull for. Good luck with setting up your network. It sounds a good idea. Also, good luck with the house move xx Wishing you happy thoughts & many good days xx cathy
Hi
I too just discovered this site I too am suffering pnd and accepting that has been the hardest part. I am a strong confident woman with a job in retail management . I have two beautiful children and a lovely husband . My first bout occurred when I took an overdose as a teenager the only regret I had then was that my attempt failed. I put it behind me and went on as if nothing happened. I then went on to achieve academically professionally and personally, I don’t do failure well and put myself under pressure to be a success. I seemed to have it all until my little boy began school and I fell apart. I could not eat sleep go outside or watch tv. It was a struggle I took the alternative route natural meds walks and counselling I gave up alcohol but after 6 mths I had to take medication ,
As I got better I returned to work reduced meds and felt ok.
Last yr I gave birth to a beautiful girl who was much adored I breastfed and again felt all was good until she was 4 mths and pnd returned with a bang. Life is a struggle but doing my best really glad to discover this site.
Thanks
Lisa x